Life, Birth, Jared


Today, Sanny and I had the pleasure of welcoming our son, Jared Isaiah Hauck, into the world. We are so excited to bring home another little Hauck to join our family. This brings the grand total to four children at home that we have the privilege of parenting.

We rejoice and are so thankful for the opportunity to love this new person that God has brought into the world. He doesn't belong to me, or to us, but is a person belonging to God, made in the image of God, who has been granted to us by God for our temporary stewardship and instruction and protection.  He is totally helpless, does not know anything about this world, needs someone to protect him and feed him and care for him and teach him.  What an awesome task!  Today was such a wonderful day.


And yet, it was also a difficult day.

Before the joy comes...difficulty, mostly for my wife. This is now the fifth full pregnancy and fifth time she has given birth. I can tell you that it has not gotten any easier to stand by her side five times and watch her undergo such pain with no ability to do anything to help her but to hold her hand. It is a traumatic event. And I'm just an observer. 

I love my wife so much and am left speechless by her service and sacrifice for our children in the very act of bringing them into this world, not to mention the days and weeks and years of service of her pouring her life into loving and teaching and serving our children. She is awesome.

(aside: People who despise such work as inferior to a "professional career" are crazy. If you don't have the heart to invest in your children, do you think your nanny will? If both you and your nanny don't, then who will?)


And yet, not all have this privilege. After we were taken to the portpartum room today, I looked out the window to enjoy the scenery from the new Oakland Kaiser facility, and saw a building across the street: Albert Brown Mortuary. Talk about contrast.

Not every expecting couple visiting the hospital today walked away with a happy healthy baby. In fact, we were in that very position just three years ago with Evelyn. We found ourselves in need of those services, rather than instructions on how to feed and clothe, etc. It is hard to get nearer to the reality of the sheer fallenness of the world we live in then when dealing with the death of young children. Life was not supposed to be this way. We as humankind have messed things up royally, and the effect is ever before us.


There are many worthy reflections here.

Death is horrible. It is not natural and not normal. It is the result of sin. I weep with those who have lost children either in labor or otherwise. Death in general is the penalty of rebellion in general against God. Every time we face it, we are reminded that we will one day face our Maker. 

Labor is horrible. Genesis 3 says pain in childbirth is a direct result of the fall of mankind into sin. 

Parenting is a privilege, not a right. So we cannot demand life from our Maker. 

Parenting is a privilege, not a burden. So we do not neglect it or grumble over its inconveniences (which admittedly are many...)

Travail is often the pathway to joy.  Christ suffered on the cross for the joy set before him of saving his people and bringing glory to God. God leads us through dark valleys only because they lead to the greener pastures of greater love for him and greater appreciation of his mercy. Do not avoid making difficult decisions because you like your life as it is, in particular when you know it is something God has called you to do. 

Christ is our Redeemer! He saves us from the penalty of sin by having paid our just penalty in our place, in order to grant forgiveness and peace with God. Christ will come and rescue all who repent of their rebellion and put their trust in him, and redeem and restore this fallen world!

Back to Jared...



Thanks for letting me share with you a bit about Jared. We're excited to finally meet him.

Jared. Because it's a cool name and we like it. 

Isaiah. Because "the LORD is salvation", and we want him and others to know it.

Hauck. Because he's a Hauck. =)





Commending Them to God

Those who read this blog have probably already heard the news by now, but figure it is about time to say it in public. Long story short is that I will be stepping down from the pastoral ministry, having concluded over a long period of struggling that I am not yet fit to be in the pastoral role, finding myself lacking both a clear calling and a sufficient training. 

I came here to Taiwan to try to serve the church here, out of love for them upon hearing that they would be without a pastor--but not out of a response to the call of God. Even now, it is still this man-centered desire ("I can still do it!") that makes me want to continue and be there for them. Yet, if God has not called me here, then I ought not to be here. I also came without finishing a full seminary training and without sufficient time "learning the ropes" in practical ministry experience, with the result that I really am just not equipped to do the work here.  

I have decided with counsel that I am not suited for this, at least not at this juncture. We will see what God has prepared for the future. But if there is a next time, it will be approached more cautiously and preceded by completed training. I plan for now to return to EBCB as a normal member, work as a programmer, and grow as a Christian.

Many have wished I would have continued and persevered. Many are possibly shocked by this news. Hadn't I just said I was seeking to grow in faithfulness and perseverance? What made this decision easy and fast at the end was when things came into clear focus and I realized it was not an issue of perseverance, but of principle. While the struggles here were the occasion of me asking hard questions about whether I am fit here, they were not ultimately the cause. In the end, if I am doing this only because I want to help people, and not in obedience to God's call, and if I am not adequately trained, then I simply should not keep doing it. So that is the plan for now. 

Pastor John visited here this past weekend to talk to the church about how this decision affects them. They will be continuing (at least for the next 6 months) to meet together and pray together for God's provision of another pastor. Please pray with them as I will surely be doing. The great comfort to me at this time is that the Lord is my Shepherd, and the Lord is their Shepherd. It has been an amazing privilege to serve them and be used for the salvation of some and the spiritual growth of others. Yet, it is time for me to set this lofty position down for now and entrust them to God.

Acts 20:32 seem to be the right words to close with:

And now I commend you to God and to the word of his grace, which is able to build you up and to give you the inheritance among all those who are sanctified.

Now I get two more sermons to help prepare them to wait, and to prepare them to receive the next pastor who comes. Please pray I can invest as much as I can into them in these next two weeks. I will return to America on Oct. 31. Thank you for your faithful prayers on our behalf. Please keep them coming for the church.




Encouraging Post by Keller

I am greatly encouraged to see Tim Keller's humble correction of his response in the interview posted about a week ago by Justin Taylor. Glad to hear that this is indeed not his first renouncing of these views but that he did so immediately. Wish this information had been made known and more communication had gone on before posting of the interview, since they appear to come from the same source: The Gospel Coalition

Praise God for humble leaders who readily and honestly admit their mistakes. I might add (in parallel to something I said in the previous post), that many who are willing to speak the truth in any situation are not always willing to admit their mistakes. Some who speak the truth no matter what have a harder time humbling admitting their faults. And thus, my hat is now off to Tim Keller, for whose example I am greatly indebted, and I hope I myself would be able to emulate.




Discouraging Interview with Bashir and Keller

I was happy to see an interview posted on Justin Taylor's blog between Martin Bashir and Tim Keller. I liked the honesty and directness of Bashir in his earlier interview of Rob Bell that I had seen, and I was excited to see how Tim Keller would answer him. The first 10 minutes were quite encouraging. Tim Keller gave insightful answers to tough questions. But starting around 11 minutes, Bashir asked about what happens to people who do not believe in Jesus, will they go to hell?


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Goodbye Naruto, Goodbye One Piece

For those who don't know, I am much a fan of Naruto and One Piece, two Japanese comics about ninjas and pirates respectively. I've read them since college, and find them most enjoyable, hilarious and awesome. Yet alas, the day has come when I must say goodbye.

I had been reading them online for some time. There were websites offering it all over the place and never questioned really whether it was legal or not. Several months ago, I began to be convicted about this and decided to stop. Shortly after this, Japanese manga companies began to crack down and all the websites started shutting down, with the exception of one I knew of. 

However, shortly after this, I found a page on the official Shonen Jump website, which allowed free online viewing. Contented at this, that the publisher was making it available online, I kept reading for a time. However, I have noticed that lately they have taken this down. Alas, any warrant from the publisher for reading it online is now removed. 

Count it my public confession, or recanting, of reading online manga. No more.

Maybe we can find somewhere for this in the budget.... =)




Evelyn Claire Hauck (郝詠真)

My wife Sanny and I were expecting a daughter to be born on Thursday, June 30, 2011, yet instead on that day we found instead that something had gone wrong, and our daughter had no more heartbeat. Our hearts broke. That Thursday evening they began to induce labor, though it wasn't until Saturday that labor actually begun, and was finished in three (intense) hours. Sanny and I buried her a week later on July 7th, and we just had a memorial service for her today, July 9th, 2011. 

I write in order to inform those who have not yet heard, as well as to share some reflections on this in hindsight now that this chapter of our lives is wrapped up and we move on forward. 

Our hope is in the Lord

This is surely the first thing to say. The Lord truly comforted and strengthened us throughout this time, due in great part to the love and prayer of our church and family. The Lord carried us through. Our hope is in him none the less. When the grief comes in waves threatening to carry us away, we are tethered back down by God's goodness toward us in Christ and his kind reign over all things.

We trust in the Lord Jesus with our lives. We trust in him with our children. As we remember the love of God toward us, even sending his beloved Son to ransom us by his own blood, to pay the debt of our sin, withholding absolutely nothing needed to save us wholly by grace and make us wholly his forever--we are convinced of his love to us, and we are thus enduring this trial. We know his love for us not by our lives being smooth now, but by his securing our eternal redemption, safety, joy through the blood of the cross. 

We know she is with the Lord. We know that we will see her on the last day, in the resurrection. We know that the same Lord who redeemed her is also our Redeemer. Our hope is in the Lord.

We love her

If there is anything more to say, it is that we love her so much. We are thankful that we got to see her and hold her after she was born. She was beautiful. We cherish those moments. She is dear to us in our hearts. The memory of her is not bitter, or something to try to forget to ease our pain. We hope that we can always remember her. It was our great privilege to honor her and love her with a proper burial and a memorial service.

Yet we also feel the painful futility that the world we live in has been subjected to on account of our sin. In this we eagerly long all the more for the redemption of our bodies on that final day when the Lord Jesus returns and we are rescued from sin and all its horrible effects.  The concept of "kingdom" has been precious. We long for that perfect kingdom that Jesus will establish: the world as it ought to be, as God intended.

Evelyn Claire Hauck (郝詠真)

Her English name is Evelyn Claire Hauck. Originally, before we knew the gender, we thought of the name Evan, which comes from the Greek word meaning "the gospel". When we found out it was a girl, we chose Evelyn since it sounds similar to Evan. Her middle name Claire is my grandma's middle name. We had hoped she would know and believe the gospel of Jesus Christ, and live as a testimony to it.

Her Chinese name is 郝詠真 ("hao3 yong3 zhen1"). The first character my last name. The second character means to sing / praise. The third word means truth. We had hoped she would treasure and praise the truth of God. Indeed, she now is praising and loving the truth of who God is in a much more and fuller sense than we are!

We look forward to joining her in singing the mercy of God's kindness toward us in Christ for all the ages to come (Eph. 2:7).

In closing?

It has been hard to find any fitting words in closing. The most difficult part is saying goodbye and moving on, and yet we must move on in faith. We move on not to forget, but to cherish. God has brought a peaceful sense of closure to in own hearts due to the hope we have for her and for ourselves in Christ.

We love her so much. We miss her. We hope in the Lord Jesus. We rejoice in the Lord with her, and we eagerly look forward to the resurrection.




Osama Is Dead, Shall We Rejoice?

Heard the news yesterday that Osama bin Laden was killed recently by American troops. While there is no doubt the man is worthy of death for his crimes, I am very uncomfortable with the spirit of celebration that went on at his death.


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Chinese Parenting Is Superior?

Al Mohler writes about a book entitled, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, written by a Chinese mother about the superiority of Chinese parenting over Western parenting. I do not necessarily approve of "Western" parenting. Yet neither can I approve of much Chinese parenting I see.  The selfish, rebellious, idolatrous heart of mankind rears its ugly head in parenting in different ways in Chinese culture than it does in American culture. 


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Disaster in Japan from a Holy and Good God

Martyn Lloyd-Jones said in his Preaching and Preachers something to the effect that a preacher should always respond to large-scale disasters / crises. I was considering preparing a sermon for this Sunday on the sovereign freedom of God and the urgent need to repent and believe in Jesus Christ, and pray for and evangelize the lost.


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Mohler on Tyler Clementi and Christian love

Between the Boy and the Bridge — A Haunting Question, Al Mohler

Christians do not lie about what sin is and redefine it to make people feel better. Shame is the right response for sin against God. Yet, let there be an end to the bullying and joking that puts certain people in categories of "sinfulness" of their own. Are we any better? Let us have compassion as God has had toward us, that they might see the love of God toward them.

Was there no one to step between Tyler Clementi and that bridge? Was there no friend, classmate, or trusted adult who had the courage and compassion to reach into his life and offer hope? Was there no one who could tell him that the anguish of his moment would not last for his lifetime? Was there no one to put into perspective the fact that people who did not love him had taken advantage of him, but that the many who did love him would love him no less?
Even long before they may hear or respond to the gospel, they need to know that they are loved and cherished for who they are. They need to know that we stand between them and those who would harm them. They need to know that we know how to love sinners because we have been loved despite our own sin.
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Matt Hauck (郝柏昇)

A once enemy now son, forgiven and freed by Jesus' blood, adopted and called by grace for glory.   (more...)